I met a good friend for dinner last night and our conversation got me thinking.. I have always felt so envious of people that always had a set career direction or life goal. You know when you are in school and your friend had their heart set on being a vet or a teacher or a musician and they were just made to do that? I always struggled to answer the question of what I wanted to be when I grow up, because I just never really had that ‘calling’ that other people seemed to have. Some of my friends of course found careers they didn’t originally plan or have changed their course along the way to a new passion that evolved in their adult years, but by now most people I know are pretty well established in their chosen career path.

Back in the day I absolutely dreaded seeing the guidance counselors at school. No matter how hard I tried to figure it out, I just never had one field that stood out to me. I started modelling full time after university which was an opportunity that arose by chance and I just ran with ( you can read more about how I became a model here). Modelling was never something I saw myself getting into growing up, and even now I am kind of shocked that I have been so lucky to be doing this for ten years! I count myself extremely lucky to have fallen into a job that has been both fun and paid my bills, but being in a job that is known for having a ‘shelf life’ I am often asked ‘what will be next?’, Or worse ‘when are you getting a REAL job?’. To put it bluntly the next person to ask me this is likely to get a kick to the nether regions (don’t say I didn’t warn you!) because being completely honest I still don’t know what I want to do when I grow up and I’m nearly thirty!

I am aware that modelling is very rarely a forever career and how long your career lasts, is often out of your hands to an extent. There will always be anxieties in the back of my mind about the future. Eg. If I have kids one day will I bounce back to the sample size that is required by my clients? or will the work dry up once I hit a certain age? I’d say I have gone through every hypothetical scenario and tried to figure out what I would do if it were to arise. Please bear in mind the thought of having to start a new career from scratch is pretty terrifying for anyone and these are the reasons why I dislike such anxiety provoking questions re my career;

1. It is no ones business  

2. Being asked such questions isn’t helpful unless you are offering me an alternative job or a winning lottery ticket

3.Maybe my eureka moment is still to come and I will tell you if that happens, until then Bye Felicia.

Surely I am not the only person that hasn’t mapped their entire future out. Right?? Ok I already know the answer because I discussed this with my friend who felt the same way so I can confirm there are at least two of us! In all seriousness though I am sure there are lots of people like myself who are uncertain about your future plans, and might need the reassurance that is in fact ok. Sure it would be easier if I knew exactly what I wanted to do after modelling, and a goal to work towards but I have made the conscious decision to stop panicking about the future and to enjoy my life in the present. Maybe I will keep modelling and be one of those fabulous mature models rocking my grey hair in an M&S add in years to come, who knows! It doesn’t matter if you have found your ‘forever’ career, or if you are just working your ass off in the job that is for now. OR maybe you haven’t decided if this one is the ‘just for now’ or ‘forever job’ yet. Whatever path you are on, just do you.

Let me know in the comments if you found your dream career or if you are still searching..

Until next time…


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